You see, I never go out on weeknights anymore, cause I just can't hang with the youngsters like I used to, but for some god awful reason I thought a "Tuesday Night Fun Fest" was in order. Great time last night, extreme fun was had, but my oh my, I'm paying for it today in the form of a NEGA-PUMP. I'm doing my best to get out of the PUMP PIT, but nothing seems to be doin' the trick...
I tried listening to pumpy music... didn't work.
I tried drinking a 16oz pumpy energy drink... didn't work.
I tried getting positive encouragement from a coworker... didn't work. Major fail.
Even my typical Google image search pictures are lamer than usual today. Sad clown.
So you see my dear friends, I am in serious need of a PUMP INTERVENTION. And I think my only hope is from supporters of HUMP DAY PUMP UP. Please do your part today by donating $10 to the PUMP FUND by texting the word "PUMP" to 90999 I'm totally messing with you don't text I just made it up it's not real you're wasting a text message put down your phone I'm just fucking with you don't be an idiot there is no PUMP FUND (yet) and I'm just going to blow your money on booze and McDonalds don't do it.
But seriously, what you CAN do to help is to take your best shot at PUMPING ME UP. Submit your very own HUMP DAY PUMP UP entry in the comments section below. DO IT. It can be anything - a funny anecdote, a short story of something funny that happened to you at work, a link to a picture of James Brown doing the splits while pissing himself, it doesn't matter! Just let me know WHAT'S PUMPING YOU UP.
Don't worry about grammar or even making sense at all, just do your best to get me pumped. You can keep it totally anonymous (that means YOU, pervert!) so you can post anything you want. Ok, hows about this?? The person to get me THE MOST PUMPED will win a special treat. AND YOU KNOW I DON'T MESS AROUND WHEN IT COMES TO TREATS.
Submit your comment below.
LET THE PUMP-OFF BEGIN.
24 comments:
THE ORIGINAL HUMP DAY PUMP UP http://heckyeahman.com come get PUMPED UP with the HDPU OGs, meatman.
Also, when you came down here last May, I didn't realize you liked McDonald's and Subway so much. If I'd known that, we would have totally eaten there. Obviously, I already knew you booze.
Get fucked up
*I already knew you love booze
HUMP DAY PUMP UP!!!
Here are a few AM-FUCKING-AZING reasons to get pumped today!!!
1. I almost stepped right into a mess of frozen dog poop and broken glass at the vet this week. This did not happen to you. You should be pumped.
2. I heard a guy on the bus yesterday talking about some friend's baby momma who was as fat as a butterball turkey. Public transportation trash talking FOR SURE deserves a pump up!
3. Ashley Ryan is coming back into town tonight!!!!! There will be a big party on Friday night celebrating her birth and her departure (not death, but strangely ironic). How can you not be pumped to see her?!!!
4. You don't look like these people! http://images.dailyradar.com/media/uploads/showhype/story_large/2009/12/14/snooki_from_jersey_shore_twitter_profile_photo.jpg
http://images.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/20091209/293.jerseyshore.delvecchio.paul.lc.120909.jpg
Get pumped about not having the word cadillac tattooed on your rib cage.
GET PUMPED GODDAMMIT.
About this time last year, you were already pumped for summer. I dont think it is too early to start getting jacked about the best time of year. Think LMD2010, Sage, Beers, outside, fireworks. Think Beach, tubing, 70 degrees. It will be hear before you know it. Also, if you are doing anything productive Friday, let me know, I got nothing going on.
^ here ^
You should be pumped that Louisa wrote such a good fucking pump-up! That shit was amazing...how can you not be pumped...especially about number 3!!! I fly back to MPLS TONIGHT MUTHA FUCKER (hahaha Mutha???)
and you are REQUIRED to be at the Red Stag at 10:30 on Friday. GET PUMPED.
ok, wow, Louisa, um... you're pretty much dominating. AM-FUCKING-AZING is an understatement to say the least!
And if you're not even seeing this comment (cause like, who goes back to check the comments section on someone else's blog, right? Oh YOU DO?? AWESOME!!!!) I'll be sure to remind you of how awesome it was IF i happen to attend the Stag partay Friday.
Thanks for the pumps erbody!
http://failbooking.com/2010/02/05/funny-facebook-fails-texts-cost-money/
A lil late for the pump. But, I couldn't find this before. But it was similar to your text pump to 90089 or whatever so I thought I'd post er.
this is REALLY late for the w-day pump ... but it just came to me, finally, that there is NO ONE who cannot get pumped to this song ... it's just not possible, unless you're an anti-pump communist bastard ;) hahaha ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3ZAGBL6UBA
WHISTFUL TODD - Greatest Hits Vol.1
Featuring all your favorite Whistful Todd jams.
tracklisting
1. Old Man (takin' a pee)
2. Nanny Chims
3. Panic
4. Meat and Potatoes Girl
5. Jesus Day (Jump it's your B-day)
6. Moses and the Ark
7. Jesus was a Flaming Racist
8. 35 year old born again Christian
9. 10 more Commandments
10. Teamwork (Scrubbin' Backs Techno Remix)
11. An American Scheme
12. Raptor Roar
13. Prehistoria
14. Sattelite in The Sky (Take My Picture)
15. Little Fairies
16. The Breast Enhancer
Disc 2 - Demos from the Bands Original Earthworm Jane and Super Haze Recordings
----------------------------
1. Frame You
2. Mi-ilk
3. Bit by a Bat with Rabies
4. Private Eye
5. Welcome to the Jungle Barbra.
6. What's in a Name (Skinny Stan)
+ bonus track from Five Finger Discount
--------------------------
7. The Metallica Medley (39 mins of your favorite Metallica Anthems)
+ 3 NEW Never Before Heard Recordings
--------------------
8. George Bush Beef Barbeque Bonanza
9. Clinton's Coronary
10. You say Osama, I say Obama. (Let's call the whole thing off.)
There is only one real reason for AD to get pumped and that is, the fact that somewhere in the world. Some place out in the great wide yonder. Dave Mustaine is growing whiskers. Whiskers just for you.
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